You are Mine!!!!!

This is exactly what my mother used to tell me all the time. "You are mine".  I got used to hearing it probably from the time I was born.  And now when I'm thinking it, it was followed by that hideous smirk.  The one you see that makes you cringe on the inside but you know its okay cause mommy only loves you.  I might be sarcastic in my blog, but that's me.  Oh, and also she liked to mention that she feeds me, otherwise I'd be dead, so remember that.  Without eating, there would be no me, so get used to it, and she provides the food so you are only a possession, to do with as she pleases.  Never mind that dad was the one who bought the groceries and she didn't work, but okay, whatever.  She only added that part in sometimes, I think its because a MN has limited energy, and need to spend most of their time feeding, not explaining things.  You are mine is so much easier to say.

So, here is the malignant narcissist reasoning.  You don't exist without them, keep that in mind as you go about your life.  And come to think of it, I don't know why mother needed to give any reasoning.  And it was not like I could even understand what she was saying before I was not even able to walk.  I say that because it seems to be always with me, what she said about me being dead.

But let's see now, we have dog owner's, cat owner's, home owner's, just about everything in this world you can own, so why in hell would you want to own a child?  You can torture a dog or a cat (sorry, I'm not trying to be horrible here, but to make a point), you can trash your home and tear it down if you like.  So why a human child?  The answer is simple, these sub-humans need to feed on narcissistic supply.  There is not better no easier way to get it.  It's their drug of choice.  Torture a human, and they feel really good. Torture a human child and you have a captive source of supply for life. One that can't fight back. You own them, you get to do what you want to with them, its that simple.  Until, the child awakens and realizes mommy was only a blood-sucking waste of human life.

Omg, that was so sick typing that, I almost wanted to heave.  And I can't even imagine what goes on in their demented minds the rest of the time they are not feeding.  I know I was not given any choices as a child. I don't think dad noticed her predatory ways, but it did affect him after awhile (that's for another time).  Dad bought me a pony when i was 10, and no one else in my school had a pony.  I was happy and felt quite privileged.  I used to ride that pony, and sing this song:

Early one morning, just as the sun was rising,

I heard a robin sing in the valley below. 

So one day, I went running in the house, and mom was there, she was laughing all to herself.  I asked her what was so funny, she said, "Oh, I guess you didn't hear me, I said you are wearing out the horse to give your lazy ass a ride".  Then she continued laughing.  All to herself she was laughing.  Okay, I guess I missed the joke.  From then on, I couldn't seem to get that peaceful feeling back about riding the pony, I just couldn't and the song was gone from my heart.  I rode after that but somehow, not the same anymore.  

I guess it's because I was owned and it was not a good thing for her to see me happy.  It wasn't feeding her supply, which is what she needed.  How creative of her to come up with such a line.  You know I have to give her credit for that.  And now, when I think of it, I really needed her approval after that for anything I tried, which I never got.  She wanted me to appreciate her sense of humor, which I really tried to do.  "Oh, its so funny".  And come to think of it, every malignant narcissist I have ever known has that "sense of humor" too.  And its disgusting.

You are mine, are words to me that I'll never want to hear again.  For the longest time I was told by my aunt (her sister) that was because mother loved me so much that "you are mine" is the only way she can describe her overwhelming love.  

But getting back to that dog, cat or homeowner.  You might own them, but would you ever want to destroy them?  Would a morally sane human want to be so destructive?

Don't you want to keep your possession as long as you can?  I heard of some pet owner's practically spending their entire living tending to their animal.  That is what is in their hearts.  What is in the heart of a malignant narcissist?