I invited myself to spend tomorrow night at my oldest daughter's(Jessie). She is babysitting for a few people including her youngest sister's newborn. I'm so excited. I don't think my youngest(Maggie) will be too pleased when she finds out. But she has no choice, she can't find a sitter this late before New Year's. I haven't seen any of the grandkids since Dec. 5.
My husband wants to go to a house party at his malignant narcissist buddy. No way, I got out of it. The people here are all MN's I think. Very money oriented, very baby boomerish, very sickening. I don't think my husband likes them either, and as far as the snowplowing goes, which my husband has been doing for practically free will be all over soon. The poop is going to hit the fan. I'm going to spend my time with young people.
The kids are still a little angry with me, but they will get over it. She is expecting me to come over for the evening and I am bringing my homemade bowtie pasta. This is the incentive. There will be a whole bunch of kids there and it will be fun.
I've done some researching on mother's with MN daughter's with children, and there isn't much. It seems that eventually that the grandmother will be tossed out of the family, but I got a few ideas on how this would happen. I do have an advantage. If you don't call the triangulation she did as aggressive, then she is not outwardly aggressive towards me. We can get along essentially, as long as she doesn't turn into an angry MN.
I won't agree with everything she says to me. I'll not argue, simple as that. That should work. She is young and so it is mild right now. We have always gotten along. We were so close. In her early teens she wanted books that were so horrible, she read "The Child Called It", 3 times. Then she wanted the sequel. It was about severe child abuse to the point where the parent basically erased the child's identity as a person. So similar to what my mother did to me. But anyways, she was hooked on the books, could she have been feeding?
I told Jessie that and she said that Maggie was compassionate, not MN. I know what the book was about and I could never pick it up. Even the movie, "Precious". I had to walk away from the movie. Maggie watched the movie over and over again, then wanted the book to read.
Maggie knows the whole story about me and she seems to avoid me. Now she has this baby boy. I hope and pray I live a very long time, and get to spend lots of time with them. She has yet to show me her apartment, I have no idea where she lives anymore. She recently moved with her boyfriend. He is a kindly fella, hard worker, and she goes to college.
So yeah, there was a time in her mid teens she punched a wall and broke her hand. She would not explain to me to talk to me about it. I still don't know why it happened. She was a bit of a bully in school. She never hung around a rough crowd, she had different friends all the time, she had a hard time keeping friends.
Her father was a MN, my second ex-husband. The guy I stayed married to for 20 years. This guy would make you shake your head. Is he an MN? He was charming and could make you think he was the most wonderful guy on earth. Sweet and kind, one time a neighbour had an issue with me, and husband said, "Always take the high road". So that means we pacify people? Huh? "You are such a bitch. How dare you make people mad at you, you have no social skills, you should learn to get along with people." Not that I ever fought with the neighbours, but you see I was a target for bullies. This was just a chance for him to get a dig at me.
Then there was the time I bought a small swimming pool for the kids. He was home all day and thought it would be fun for them. It was $200. He filled it up and let only the neighbour kids use it, not our kids. "Your kids are always to bad for me to let them use the pool, why should we let the neighbour kids suffer?" It was weeks before I found this out. Is this not mindbending screwy?
Nowadays, he is constantly in bed. He works cause he has to eat, but he never sees the kids. Maggie goes over to see him and begs for his attention. I told her that she doesn't need to do that, but she wants to and I understand.
So yeah, if you can and if you pray, please pray I live a long time.